


Something I started Years ago and Never Finished

by fabulousfanficfairy



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Cas and Dean - Freeform, Fluff, M/M, SPN - Freeform, short fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-19
Updated: 2020-06-19
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:07:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24797401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fabulousfanficfairy/pseuds/fabulousfanficfairy
Summary: I found this document in the depths of my google drive. It has a plot summary of what should happen next at the end, but I've decided to end it where I left off. I'm not really feeling the same energy to write SPN fics anymore, so I figured I'd just post this. Maybe ne day I'll decide to write the ending.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, deanxcas
Kudos: 3





	Something I started Years ago and Never Finished

“What did you think about that last house?” Cas asked, as he and Dean walked down the sidewalk towards the Impala.  
“What? The one we just got rid of vengeful spirits in?”  
Cas nodded. “Yeah.”  
Dean just laughed, before climbing into the car. “What do you mean, what did I think? I think the history of it sucked ass.”  
Cas fell silent before climbing into the car after Dean. He slid into the backseat. Sam, who had been listening as he walked behind the pair, gave Cas a sympathetic smile before sliding into shotgun. He knew what the former angel was trying to do, and also knew that his brother would be horribly dense about it.  
Before Sam could say anything to try to help his brother’s boyfriend out, Dean turned the car on and slid in a Metallica cassette. The music filled the car, making it almost impossible for Sam to say anything. He didn’t turn it down until the song had finished, and by then Sam’s moment of opportunity to say something about it had passed. They returned to their motel without any further conversation.  
Dean started packing up their bags as soon as they got to the Sleepy Inn motel.   
“Whoa, Dean, what’s the rush? You found another job already?”   
Dean grunted, tossing his bag towards the door. “Yeah. This morning when we were reading the obits, I mentioned a girl in Ohio. Something about it still isn’t sitting right with me, so I think we should go check it out.”  
“Okay, but you don’t want to take a break first? We’ve been moving for the last ten hours.”  
Dean turned to look at Sam, with obvious concern on his face. “Sorry, man. You’re right, you guys probably need to rest. I’ll start looking into the local history of the town before we head there, you should get some rest.”  
“Dean, that’s not what I meant. I just feel like you’re rushing to move from one job to another.”  
Dean glanced over at Cas, who was perched on the edge of the bed, observing the two talk. “Sam, can I talk to you outside for a second? Alone?”  
The two stepped out of the motel room, letting the door slam behind them.  
“Dean, what's going on? Did something bad happen between you and Cas?”  
Dean rubbed his hand over his face, and sighed. He looked incredibly tired. “That’s the thing- nothing bad has happened. Our relationship is great. He knows about our incredibly messed up family and STILL loves me.”   
As he was speaking, Dean’s voice got more and more tense.   
Sam shook his head at his idiot brother. “And you’re getting spooked.”  
“I am not spooked!”  
Sam smiled disapprovingly at his brother. “Then what’s the problem? He’s too perfect?”  
“Ok! Fine! I’m spooked! I’ve never had a really healthy relationship before, not like this. What if I mess this up?”  
“Dean. Relationships are made of messing up. You just have to be willing to fix it when you mess up. And it would help if you didn’t ignore your boyfriend so much, you know?”  
“I’m not ignoring him!”  
Shaking his head, Sam moved to open the door and go back into the motel room. “Sure, and I’m not a hunter.”  
Sam let the door slam behind him, leaving Dean standing outside alone. 

As soon as Sam came back in, Cas stood up.  
“What happened? Did I do something wrong?” The anxiety was so clear on Cas’ face that it almost broke Sam’s heart.  
“Cas, no. He just isn’t used to this kind of relationship, that’s all. I think he’s scared that he’s going to mess up and push you away. And because of that fear he is pushing you away, but not because he wants to be.”  
“But Dean could never mess up, not so much that I’d want to leave him.”  
The innocence and pure loving desire in Cas’ eyes pulled at Sam’s heartstrings again. He just wished he could get his dickhead of a brother to pull his shit together.   
Sam sighed, but didn’t say anything. He honestly wasn’t sure what he could say- besides that’s when Dean decided to walk back in.   
“Alright, well, I’m going to go to the diner down the street and grab something to eat. Cas, you want to come with me?”  
Cas’ eyes lit up in a horribly hopeful way, and Dean could see that he’d been doing everything wrong. “What about Sam?”  
Sam just smiled. “I’m going to take a nap- but bring me back something, ok?”  
Dean smiled, and lead Cas out of the motel and into the Impala. They drove in silence for the several minutes that it took to get to the diner. Cas stared moodily out the window this whole time, but his back felt hot, like Dean’s gaze was penetrating his skin.  
Dean barely kept his eyes on the road, preferring to glance nervously at Cas. What could he say that could make up for what he had already said?  
As soon as they had parked, Cas reached for the door handle. However, he felt Dean’s hand on his arm, pulling him to stop.  
“Listen, Cas. Can we talk?”  
Cas turned to look at Dean with his piercing blue eyes. He didn’t say anything, but gave the tiniest nod.  
“Listen, Cas. I, well, I’m sorry. I’ve been ignoring you and brushing you off lately.”  
Cas shook his head, trying to smile. “Dean, it’s fine. If you aren’t feeling it, then you aren’t feeling it. As the kids say.”  
“When have the kids…? Never mind. Listen, it’s just that this whole time I’ve been letting my fear guide me. I’m afraid of messing up, losing you. But by doing that I’m pushing you away.” Dean’s gaze had fallen down to his hand that was still on Cas’ arm.  
This time, Cas did smile. “Dean.”  
Dean’s eyes snapped up to meet Cas’.   
“There is nothing you could do to lose me. There is no way you could mess up badly enough that I would want to leave you. So you need to stop being so afraid of that. I will always love you.”  
Dean’s eyes grew wide in excitement just as fast as Cas’ face turned hot.  
“You’ve never said that before.”  
Cas shook his head, and tried to ignore the burning at the tips of his ears. “I mean, well, I just-”  
“I love you, too.”  
Cas stopped stuttering. He had no more words in him. Besides, even if he did, he knew he couldn’t get them past the burning feeling in his heart.

**Author's Note:**

> For those of you wondering, the ending was going to follow these lines:  
> A cute, short, kiss scene.   
> A nice meal in the diner, with them talking and kinda figuring stuff out.  
> Dean asking why Cas keeps asking about how he feels about houses, and Cas (embarassed) explaining that he thought Dean might want to settle down one day, or at least have a home base.   
> Continue onto the next hunt, having to do with the obit Dean mentioned earlier.   
> More progression of the reltaionship.  
> Cut forward to one day when they do buy a house together, and it has a steam shower in it (the whole idea for this fic came from the bugs episode of season 1, where Dean is absolutely in love with the steam shower in the house they are squatting in).


End file.
